Sunday, September 23, 2007

my 5 year old loves

early this morning, roque showed me something he wrote on his notebook. he loves writing stuff like jokes for me to read and riddles for me to answer. or short notes like little reminders for me to do.

this time, the page with red and blue scribbles read:

i found his jot heartwarming and i told him to let dad read it too. "what about the states and canada?" gary asked, pertaining to relatives living there.

"oh yes, i forgot to write new zealand too," roque said, thinking of tito randy. and after a split second he said, "but they're family anyway. and i already wrote i LOVE MY FAMILY."

Monday, September 10, 2007

four eyes

it was as if my eyes knew i turned forty. suddenly, it was difficult reading the finest of fine print. i had to put the material at arm's length from my eyes so the words would be clearer. later, even the letters on my celfone got blurry. and still much later, some signs which my husband could read clearly with his glasses, i couldn't read anymore unless i squint a bit.

my husband, who's an ophthalmologist, said to wait a little longer before i use reading glasses. why he said that, i really don't know. he said something like if it's not thaaaat difficult for me to read, not to use reading glasses yet because once i do, it will be progressively difficult to be without them.

as everybody knows, reading glasses or no reading glasses, the vision deteriorates anyway. of course mine was no different. and so finally after two years of intermittently complaining -- talk about being on his patients' waiting list -- my husband got down to refracting my eyes.

choosing the frame is another story. for my small face, it was extremely hard to find a frame that fits. they were either too wide, or generally too big. i was sort of in between pediatric specs and adult specs. but, after going through numerous stores to try out countless frames, voila! here it husband thinks it's funky. my daughter thinks it's cool. my son thinks it makes me look like his classmate's mom... say what!???! the guys at work say it makes me look younger. well, i'm just happy it's comfy and i don't look too goofy with it.......... or do i?

Sunday, September 02, 2007


i am not a movie or tv freak unlike the rest of my brood and so watching a movie in a real theater is rare for me. the times we watch a movie as a family in a year is less than the number of fingers in my one hand. yesterday was an unplanned thing, my brood fetched me at work after which we were supposed to go to sportscamp at the fort to register roque into the illam baseball league. halfway there, i realized the registration schedule was not until next saturday. that's the problem about juggling home, kids, leisure, work schedules. in my desire to get all of them going like clockwork and not miss out on anything, one thing gets scheduled earlier than it should... oh well! since we were along ayala avenue, nearing greenbelt, arianna jumped at the perfect opportunity to suggest that we watch "evan almighty" instead. dad and roque promptly seconded and thirded the motion, of course. clearly outnumbered and not having any contingency plans right at that moment, ok, i agreed. this was movie #2 for me with the family for the whole year.

it was a pretty good film. i didn't fall asleep. not that my falling asleep is a sign that the film is bad. i truly enjoyed it for the light entertainment and the deep insights. in a capsule, it reminded me that when we pray for blessings which we need or want from god, he doesn't always give us exactly what we need or want but instead gives us opportunities to get what we pray for.

god has always been granting me blessings. he doesn't stop. and a lot of times, he grants me exactly what i pray for. but there have also been times when i don't get what i asked for and those i most often see as unanswered prayers because i probably don't deserve them anyway. when i get to really think about some of those instances, i realize god was just sending me the blessings in a different form. i pray for patience, and he gives me a secretary whose performance falls short of my expectations at work so that i can strive to be more patient. i pray for compassion when i treat my patients, and he gives me "difficult" patients with relatives who are not supportive so that i realize that my compassion is all the more needed. i pray for a comfortable life, and he gives me and my husband lots of work to do so we can make a good living and provide for our children. i pray for my children to love learning, and he gives them challenging tasks in school so that they will strive to study harder and be inspired to learn more when their efforts are acknowledged. i pray that i will be a good wife and mother, and he gives me a whole lot of responsibilities outside the home to heighten my need to consciously spend time with my family. he also gives me that extra time and strength to spare so that i can use them to make my family top priority.

dear god, thank you for granting me the blessings i exactly pray for and those disguised as opportunities to be able to get the blessings i need and want. i know i only have to ask and i shall receive the blessings in whatever form you give them to me. amen.